Four Quick Thoughts

As many of you know by now, Ephraim and I are divorced.  I had initially decided not to post anything because I figured that the people who cared or were curious would ask.  But I recently had a conversation with a very dear friend of mine who was in the singles ward that Ephraim and I were in when he was in the Bishopric.  I explained to her that one of the hardest parts of making the decision was knowing that so many students in this ward looked to us as an example.  I was afraid of letting them down.  In some ways, I probably have.  But it is my hope that some insights come to anyone who has looked up to us or me.  These are definitely things I have learned.

1. No one is perfect.  It doesn't matter what your calling is or how good you are or how many people follow you.  No one is perfect.  We all make mistakes.  We all have weaknesses.  What matters is that you're trying.  One of the things both Ephraim and I always wanted the singles in the ward to understand was that it's about lifting others up.  It's about helping the people around you and really loving them.  I think I can speak for both of us on this one...that's really what it's about.

2. Hold onto each other.  I hope it brought the now-married members of our ward closer together.  I hope they see that it can happen to anyone.  I hope they realize that half of marriages end in divorce, and members of the LDS church are no exception.  Take time before your marriage to really get to know each other and make sure that you are compatible.  Marriage is about more than attraction, and it's also about more than friendship.

3. It's ok to ask for help.  It does not make you weak.  It takes a strong person to ask for help...a humble person.

4. YOU CAN MAKE IT THROUGH ANYTHING.  The world might seem like it's falling apart around you.  You might feel like you are going through the hardest thing of your life.  You might want to just give up.  You might feel like God has left you.  But He hasn't.  He is very aware of you.  Whether it's divorce, death, sickness, injury, or any other pain, He understands.  When you trust in Him, you will be ok.  You can do it!

Over the last few months, I have been able to see how blessed I am.  The Lord has put very special people in my life to help me and to guide me.  He has helped me to search for the good and to stay positive during the hardest time of my life.  And if you want Him to, I know that He'll do the same for you!  =)